Hiding from Hidden Beliefs

I made a discovery on Tuesday night. The teachers at the class mentioned that a full class of 8 was a good thing at this stage.. Attending showed we were not withdrawing. It turns out that when classes reach the part about working into childhood people can tend to withdraw.

That says much about the quality of the class. I was humbled by the sharing of Tuesday night and lifted by the love expressed.

It also confirms for me my blog of Tuesday. I'll joyfully take a 'sign', thank you very much :)

I also had a realization on Tuesday night as well. However, it turns out my cold is actually the flu and I've been processing quite the collection of symptoms (more on those in later blogs). The realization was that by working through this blog I am ensuring that I cannot hide. This is about as public as it gets. I celebrate that and acknowledge the beautiful Intelligence of the One Mind. I did not realize how powerful journaling through a blog would be for my spiritual journey, nor how profound the experiences around this journey would be.

Not everyone will be comfortable with blogging their journaling experience - each person's journey and choice of expression is their own. I would suggest that you find at least one way to help yourself not withdraw from the work you are certainly here to do. Such support may include a best friend, a journal, a community, or a mentor.

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!

Challenging our Hidden Dis-Ease

The past week has been very interesting for me. I am currently experiencing a very nasty cold, and upon reflection I am reminded that in the book 'You Can Heal Your Body' Louise Hay suggests that a cold is a symptom of not being taken care of. How interesting...

In my blog yesterday I spoke about an event that triggered a fear of not being good enough. The situation I described last week actually resolves itself today in my working environment. But not only that, tonight is Practitioner class. The homework for the past couple of weeks has centred on looking back into my childhood. Tuesday is indeed a rich day of opportunities for me.

Perhaps I should take a step back. Without a doubt there's a 'story' around my childhood. My earliest memory of my father was walking in on him chasing the dragon (shooting heroin). Subsequent memories of many forms of abuse eventually led to my being placed into care by age 5, and sent to a children's home when I was 9 years old. My mother was an alcoholic, and had a habit of choosing extremely violent men and relationships. As a child I don't believe I often felt as though I was being cared for. I was taught that I couldn't trust those I should have been able to, was shown very poor examples of impulse control, and came to learn about having to rely on myself.

An exercise for Practitioner training I focused on this week really challenged me. The exercise asks the student to answer a series of questions about their childhood. As I look back to last week I know I struggled; I found it hard to get started, and about half way through I had to stop as I was feeling very, very sad. For the first time I've failed to complete my homework ahead of the class (in spite of having twice the normal time to complete it).

However, what a beautiful opportunity I have gifted myself with! As I lay in bed last night I took the opportunity to meditate. Not only did these insights come to mind but the meditation itself was very profound and touching. I am back at work today, ready for both the day with my client and class tonight. This nasty cold is a symptom, and an opportunity for me to ask myself what is beneath the dis-ease and to challenge some of my hidden beliefs.

Through choosing to remember the Truth I know that I am both good enough and cared-for. As I celebrate the spiritual investment I am currently making I am reminded that there is a difference between reading and being 'read by' a story. After all, storytelling has been used for many years to pass wisdom. How often do we take the time to learn from our own stories?

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!

Celebration

Sometimes it is easy to forget. For me my professional world is perhaps where I am most challenged to remain constantly conscious. I run my own consulting practice. My main client at this time is in the health field and is highly political. However, that's simply the 'story'.

Last week I had a moment where I was taken by surprise. At the time the situation evoked an emotional reaction within that I struggled to contain. As I refect on this I believe I did fairly well in managing to focus on the real interests (I went so far as to express what my interest in the situation was without sounding 'too' frustrated). But I know that within I experienced a physical reaction that I normally associate with fear; my stomach was in knots and emotionally I felt concern at what might happen.

And therein is the key - I lost focus on the moment and more importantly forgot that it IS all good. In being concerned at what might be we lose what is. I was able to remind myself to be conscious fairly quickly. But over the next day or so thoughts about this situation would flash jump into my mind (yes, the mOnkEY was in full swing through the forest's foliage).

A few days later it became completely apparent that everything was indeed perfect.

Why did I go through this self-inflicted stress? Upon reflection I believe that the situation evoked a fear that someone else was trying to 'take over'. I have had a deeper belief of not being good enough - an opportunity for visioning and treatmen I think. The situation triggered that belief and inwardly I felt the emotional pull to evert my authority.

I celebrate my awareness! It might not have been my ideal - but my reaction was tempered. I also celebrate this blog reflecting on what happened. This effort to reflect has highlighted a deeper belief, provided me a focus to work in the future, and aligns with my vision for mindfulness all the time.

In turn, I would suggest while mindfulness (and prayerfulness) is critical celebration is also important. Celebration is positive reinforcement. Spending time berating the mOnkEY is a good way to negatively reinforce behaviour - or punish yourself. Psychologists would invariably recommend positive reinforcement over punishment.

Our perspective of a reaction provides an opportunity to see where we truly are. Our taking the time to reflect honestly with ourselves gives us a chance to see where we are as well as where we have come from. And our realization of any success in terms of mindfulness should always be celebrated.

Be good to yourself and celebrate your successes, no matter how big or small. Positively reinforce your every success. They are precious and worthy of your love.

Stir the Soul's Waters

Stir the soul's waters and bring faith to life,
Deny certainty, and neurotic strife,
Re-evaluate all your qualities,
Invite further exploration to see
through reflected spirituality.
Put trust to the challenge, let the rope go,
Marry perfection, obsession, and flow.

© Copyright 2009, Carmien Owen

A Bigger Idea - What do YOU think?

I was flicking through books at a bookstore tonight and found myself looking at a couple of encyclopaedias on Religion. Out of curiosity I decided to try and find New Thought.

I managed to find Vampirism.

But nothing on New Thought. I went so far as to scan every atlas and encyclopaedia on Religion in the store. By the time I was done I was stunned. “Vampirism” gets a mention but New Thought seems to be missing from the mainstream in many ways.

In thinking on this a few thoughts did tumble about my mind. There are many books and authors on subjects very compatible with New Thought that has significant bookstore space. Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, and Marianne Williamson come immediately to mind.

As I worked through this observation I concluded that when the world, and individuals, is ready for New Thought it will all come together. At the same time the challenge with individual authors or ideas (such as The Secret and Oprah’s recent effort to popularize Eckhart Tolle through web courses) is the absence of community. Whilst I applaud Oprah’s efforts to bring Tolle to millions through the Web medium the common thread appears to be a wealth of ‘highlighting’ material with a lack of community to enrich and deepen the thoughts beyond.

That said I am aware that discussion forums did grow around some ideas (The Secret had a decent start in this regard). But the challenge with discussion forums is that they have to live; there has to be more than the curious leading the curious (I will return to this in future blogs - I've had a realization in this regard).

Community in spirituality is something I have come to deeply value. I have taken great strength from hearing and discussing spiritual ideas. If anything I would say the exchange and communication around abstract thinking has been very important for me over the past few years.

I believe I am very fortunate to live in a community that has a New Thought centre (and I appreciate how fortunate I am). I know there are many people reading books and being exposed to these ideas from afar that would relish community.

As I near the end of this blog I am inspired by the event earlier this evening. In experiencing an emotion I believe we should explore what opportunity there is for us. I confess that I had an emotional reaction to seeing Vampirism getting a mention whilst New Thought did not. In this moment I believe that this opportunity is clarifying my calling to Ministry. This blog is a part of that ministry, but it is just one blog. I think the idea of New Thought (or Science of Mind) being the ‘best kept secret’ is beyond done. It is time to embrace a much bigger idea.

I was recently approached by the Senior Minister at the Centre for Spiritual Living around a strategy for the Web. We have spoken on this before in the past and I have even blogged on this idea (http://consciouscalling.blogspot.com/2009/01/calling-let-us-leverage-law-of.html). I suggested that when we next come together that we start with a Visioning exercise.

The more I think on this the more I would like to encourage those of you reading this blog to collaborate with me in this exercise:

• What would ‘you’ like to see for New Thought on the Web? What do you think God's highest vision for the Web and these ideas is?
• What would you suggest to help build virtual communities? What must these communities become to empower this vision?
• Is there anything you’ve thought of in the past that you felt would work well around this idea? How must this virtual community support growth and what must we know to embody this vision?
• What must be released for there to be room for this vision?
• What must be embraced for us to be ready for this vision?
• What does this vision feel like, look like, smell like?
• If there is please comment in this blog or email me at carmien_owen@shaw.ca

Even if all you have to say is ‘Go Carmien’ please do. This is one of those few points where some feedback of any kind would really be helpful.

I can think of no better way than to embark on my ministry of expanding New Thought to a better idea through the web than to collaborate with those I already share with on the Web. Something moved me tonight - I am ready for a bigger idea. Now I am curious to see if YOU have any thoughts on this?

Compassion

During a class the other night we were discussing the frame of mind a Practitioner needs when approaching this work. The following sums up a realization I had for myself:

A Pracitioner must see the spiritual being while having compassion for the human being

Many of my blogs have some great ideals, intent and hopes. But in the end there's simple work to be done. What's the point of trying to ensure you can drive perfectly if you regularly fumble around for your keys, and scratch the door all the time in your haste to jump into the car?

Or to put it more simply - living mindfully is one thing. But the reality check - compassion is critical. It's as important to see the spiritual being in the person you are working with as a practitioner as it is to have compassion for the human being that they must be.

We live this human life, we experience the highs and the lows for a very good reason. By experiencing the bad we come to be stronger. We come to know what it feels like to be in that bad. We have freedom to make our choices so that God can celebrate that we choose It. And in turn, we come (hopefully) to a place where our deeper understanding helps us to have compassion for those going through similar experiences. There is much empowerment in empathizing or finding a better choice of words if you've been through a similar experience. For example, until a couple of years ago I couldn't relate very well to conversations about children. Now my daughter is enhancing that experience.

You might say that God can provide the answers during such times. And to that I would agree. Nothing is bigger than God. But in honouring experience and wisdom we can doubly benefit from the depth we have contemplated.

Of course, how we choose to respond to the bad greatly influences our ability to remember to remember. And as I begin this journey in service I already know that seeing the spiritual being through my eyes will be as important as having compassion for the human being through my heart. With these two eyes I will be able to perceive depth, just as our two physical eyes allow us to appreciate the depth of the physical world around us. Take away one eye and the world is not the same.

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!

Mindfulness and the Monkey Mind

Sometimes prayerfulness is hard work - and that's a good thing. I had an interesting situation last week where upon receiving an email from someone my monkey mind started jumping up and down and screaming. Thoughts about what had been written, what it would mean, what was going wrong, and what could go wrong started to climb around my brain like a monkey through a forest roof. Most interestingly that little monkey would insist on my spending time on working out how to best prepare, all the while alternating between screeching and chattering as it munched on a banana.

"Prepare for what?" I asked the monkey.

Fortunately, I did not spend too long with the monkey, at first. I thanked the monkey for its insight and gave it another banana. What can I say, I was feeling magnanimous.

However, like many monkeys this one wouldn't shut up or go away. As I trekked on through the forest it started following me. Clearly it wasn't done, and it would appear neither was I.

After about an hour of shooing the monkey away (I was out of bananas by now) I decided to meditate. Imagine if you will the tranquil forest, leaves gently rustling in the wind, and atmosphere threaded with sunbeams. I was just getting my mind cleared when that beautiful moment of clarity was shattered by chatter.

"EEEEE...OOOOOHHHH....BUT WHAT AB..."

"Shhhh..."

There is value in listening to the chatter of the mind. However, there is little value in dwelling on it. The question then becomes; how much energy are you going to invest in feeding your monkey mind bananas? Personally, I was done by the third banana, and besides I was hungry for some peace.

After some effort I did complete my meditation in peace. A couple of times during the next day the monkey mind returned offering concerns around the email once more, holding out a hand for banana with a toothy and expectant grin. Each time it became easier to focus on being mindful. By the third day the monkey was done with the topic, and so it would seem was I.

By the fifth day I was able to smile at the outcome. The situation the monkey mind had sought to so prepare me for turned out to be nothing but a good thing. I had seen the God in both the event and the person, and in turn had been proven right. But more importantly, I took a moment to thank the monkey. It had provided an opportunity for me to be mindful, to see the divinity in the moments it had scurried about my mental forest, and I had come through the journey wiser and stronger for the experience. Thank God for mindfulness and the little monkey!

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!

Hours of Prayerfulness

I recently heard a good friend of mine, Reverend Patrick Cameron, talk about an interesting idea. It has been suggested that to truly master something it takes approximately 10,000 hours of practice.

Personally, I'm not that concerned whether 5,000 or 20,000 hours is closer to the truth. But I really do like the idea that practice does translate into mastery after a given period of time. As I got thinking about 10,000 hours as being an estimate for mastery, my mind (as it occasionally does) wandered down an analytical road. If 10,000 hours of practice is required then that would translate into the following approximate numbers to master this philosophy:

• 200 years through attending 1 service per week
• 29 years if I spent one hour a day in meditation and prayer
• 20 years if I attended a class every week and spent an hour a day in meditation and prayer
• 10 years if I attended a class, spent an hour a day in meditation and actively contributed 10 hours of mindful and giving Seva (service) each week

A few thoughts come to mind. The journey not the destination (or in this case mastery) is the point. These numbers are somewhat subjective at best. But there is a valid point. If we truly seek fulfillment, to grow and to contribute to the fulfillment and growth of others then surely the key point here is that attending a class and daily meditation is only a part of the required journey.

A concept that stands out for me is the idea of walking through life in a constant state of 'prayerfulness'. A practitioner I greatly respect, Linda Watson of the Agape centre, talks of prayerfulness as her approach to life now. Personally, I can think of few ways to better turn those 10 years into a moment than by moving into a constant state of prayerfulness.

But what do I mean by mastery of this philosophy? Well, here's a list that begins to clarify how this infinite topic might begin to be broached:

• Spending each moment in mindfulness or prayerfulness
• Knowing that God (the Christ Consciousness, Spirit, One Mind) only knows love. In knowing only love as an infinite Being there is no criticism, judgment, punishment, or condemnation in the Mind of God. God has no favourites and does not look at anyone personally.
• Living the interpretation of the commandment “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbour,” through knowing that every living person is my neighbour, and that they are a spiritual being. Whether they know this or not does not invalidate this for me. Every living person includes those who live in our house, neighbourhood, city, country or on this planet.
• Constantly seeking God to express through me without specific purpose.
• Demonstrating Cause, not things, conditions and effects.
• Meditating on the nature of Universe and those signs, events and things that exist to offer me the choice to be mindful
• Living only in this moment

Blessings, joy and peace my friends.

Meditation

The concept of meditation grows on me. The approach given by Joel Goldsmith resonates. "The secret of meditation is silence: No repetitions, no affirmations, no denials - just the acknowledgement of God's allness, and then the deep, deep silence which announces God's Presence."

I now find myself sinking into a listening state more easily. During the past few meditations I have felt a jolt and then a shift into a deeper awareness – deeper peace. For some time, many years I believe, I have meditated in some ways yet not quite in this way so regularly when alone. A part of me resisted taking the time to meditate regularly each day. In the past I would say that I would have waking meditations. And I believe I did. I would quietly go about the world, driving, working, or even taking some time apart, to listen.

But taking any journey provides us an opportunity to compare stops along the way. Looking out of the windows from the train of life can be like a blur or crisp snapshots of clarity. Open fields can fold into structure, the regular clanking of wheels upon rails reminding us of how we travel.

As the train pulls into my latest stop I can see that the station has many names: Mindfulness, Seeking God without Purpose, Spiritual sonship as the One Mind works through me. Yet what I am realizing is that the frequency of stops is increasing. At first the train might pause once or twice a week, and then most days. Now it is as if the stops are the blur where structure is morphing into openness.

Money and Monkeys

I heard a story the other day about a man who stumbled across a region where there were many monkeys. There were so many monkeys that the villagers were quite fed up with them. They would get in the way, cause a nuisance and had an irritating habit of stealing bananas.

The man, being versed in the ways of commerce, saw an opportunity and decided to offer everyone 10 dollars for each monkey. The villagers heard this and scrambled about here and there to find monkeys to sell. Soon the only monkeys were the ones in the hard to reach places or out of sight.

Seeing that the pace of sale had slowed down the man then offered the villagers 20 dollars for each monkey. Hearing this they worked even harder to find any monkey they could. They looked high and low, under and over everything. Before long the man had so many monkeys that he had many cages filled with many monkeys.

The next day the man greeted the villagers once more and seeing that there were no monkeys to be found he offered them 50 dollars for each new monkey they brought to him. But there were no monkeys left! The villagers looked far and wide but they had found all the monkeys already. They returned empty handed, tired from the fruitless day.

The man then had to leave the village. He left his assistant in charge. When the man was gone the assistant looked furtively about and then made an offer to the villagers. “Since the owner is gone I’ve got an idea. I will sell you each monkey for 35 dollars. When the man returns you can sell them back to him for 50 dollars and make a tidy profit. What do you say to that?”

The villagers saw the logic in such numbers and promptly purchased all the monkeys. That night the assistant slipped out of the village and neither he nor the owner was ever seen again.

***

I will leave you to ponder the morals and meanings of such a story. However, what stands out for me is an analogy to the focus currently being placed on the economic climate in the world. I refuse to use the words commonly associated in the media with what is being expressed, as I am well aware of the energy our focus lends to an idea.

Every news release, story and report is an opportunity for mindfulness and prayer. It is a time to be clear in your potential to create. It is an opportunity to know that those involved have what they need. It is the right moment for you to focus on your own financial freedom.

The next time you see, read or hear a story about some effect or condition be mindful. Think about the words you use and hear, the feelings they evoke. The more aware you are of your own limitless potential the less you will buy in to ideas of lack that others may have. There never has been, nor will there ever be, lack - only an idea of lack manifested in the experience of those choosing to think about it.

A Spiritual Snapshot from the Past

During a recent meditation I had a fleeting image prompting me to pull out my journals. I recommend the practice of journaling as a great aspect of a path to mindfulness. This experience of reviewing words written in the past brought me great joy this evening.

To set the scene; my mother had passed away only a month before and I was sitting in my first ‘Path of Discovery’ class. Who is to say what contributed most to what I wrote? Perhaps this was a foray into a new found level of integrity? Yet as I look back I believe that I was going through one of the most significant transformations of my life until that time.

As I read this passage earlier this evening my first instinct was to ponder what might be rewritten. But a few moments later I cast such thoughts aside as silly. My heart compels me to offer these words of mine from the past with a heart cracked wide open.

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!

Have you ever walked into a room filled with people and been dazzled by life? Yesterday, I found myself walking into a store surprised by the watering in my eyes. The subtle tears were not from sadness; in that moment I was greeting the divinity in everyone I could see. I did not need to actually meet those that moved around me for we are already met. Only forgetfulness separates us, and in that instant I could remember all.

Ernest Holmes once said that "the individual mind is not really individual but individualized." This statement succinctly captures what Spirit's Unity is to me. My perspective today is not that I am growing, but that I am recalling what Spirit already knows. Only I can limit my capacity to create. Only I can forget that the Universe wants me to know all that I should, to love all that I can, and to inspire others to remember as I am beginning to.

This One Power in the Universe is all knowing and all powerful. The Law of Choice that I abide by is willing to be used as I would use it. However, only through disconnection and fear do I make choices that separate me.

As a child I recall looking to the sky at God, as if Spirit was somehow to blame, somehow the cause of my pain. As an adult my work has just begun, but still find myself occasionally shaking my fist at that ‘God in the heavens’. Yet, I am slowly coming to realize that the limit of my ability to use the power of creation is handicapped only by my failure to truly understand. Now, it is up to me to recognize when an effect has manifested. Fortunately there is also plenty of joy in recognizing beautiful cause in action. And each day I feel this joy my faith is strengthened and I find myself less willing to shake my fist as I once did.

Moving forward I am exploring with others the journey to understanding that every person is God's opportunity to reveal itself. As I live in this luminosity my thoughts shift. And following my heart’s desire I know God is Unity in my life and that there is nothing too extreme to request.

Hope and Vision

What is hope? Can hope and treatment co-exist effectively?

These questions were originally triggered for me within a class of spiritual study a couple of years ago. The premise of discussion was that the idea of a hope would run contrary to the idea of a 'knowing' that is required for an affirmation (or treatment). At the time I think I opted to place the use of the word hope into a drawer and from then on focused on the knowing.

Wikipedia describes hope as "a belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life. Hope is the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best." In retrospect this definition certainly supports the initial idea – hope is about a belief in an outcome. Inserting the word 'hope' into an affirmation would not be as clear as a statement of knowing here and now. The clarity of thinking being placed into the Law would be obscured at best.

But there is more to hope than a semantic. Hope is powerful concept. Kingdoms have been raised on its compulsion, and love serenaded by its passion. And perhaps therein is something worth pondering further? Should a word with such potency and historical consciousness be set aside not to be used again?

What if there is a better place than a treatment for hope, where the statement of knowing is not so essential? One school of (new) thought is that creation is built upon the foundation of meditation, visioning and treatment. Could hope have a home in visioning?

A discussion of what visioning is will be saved for another time. However, I do believe that there is power in hope within the visioning process. Perhaps there is room for a question such as, “What are my hopes for this highest vision?”

And as I went to continue this train of thought it was interrupted by a bend in the tracks – “but what of seeking God without purpose? Would hope really have a place there?”

For today at least I have my answer to this mental meandering and I shall cease tooting my whistle. After all, it has taken me over two years to rekindle my discussion of what hope means to me. I shall humbly stop typing now and leave you the option of contemplating what your answer might be.

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!