Challenging our Hidden Dis-Ease

The past week has been very interesting for me. I am currently experiencing a very nasty cold, and upon reflection I am reminded that in the book 'You Can Heal Your Body' Louise Hay suggests that a cold is a symptom of not being taken care of. How interesting...

In my blog yesterday I spoke about an event that triggered a fear of not being good enough. The situation I described last week actually resolves itself today in my working environment. But not only that, tonight is Practitioner class. The homework for the past couple of weeks has centred on looking back into my childhood. Tuesday is indeed a rich day of opportunities for me.

Perhaps I should take a step back. Without a doubt there's a 'story' around my childhood. My earliest memory of my father was walking in on him chasing the dragon (shooting heroin). Subsequent memories of many forms of abuse eventually led to my being placed into care by age 5, and sent to a children's home when I was 9 years old. My mother was an alcoholic, and had a habit of choosing extremely violent men and relationships. As a child I don't believe I often felt as though I was being cared for. I was taught that I couldn't trust those I should have been able to, was shown very poor examples of impulse control, and came to learn about having to rely on myself.

An exercise for Practitioner training I focused on this week really challenged me. The exercise asks the student to answer a series of questions about their childhood. As I look back to last week I know I struggled; I found it hard to get started, and about half way through I had to stop as I was feeling very, very sad. For the first time I've failed to complete my homework ahead of the class (in spite of having twice the normal time to complete it).

However, what a beautiful opportunity I have gifted myself with! As I lay in bed last night I took the opportunity to meditate. Not only did these insights come to mind but the meditation itself was very profound and touching. I am back at work today, ready for both the day with my client and class tonight. This nasty cold is a symptom, and an opportunity for me to ask myself what is beneath the dis-ease and to challenge some of my hidden beliefs.

Through choosing to remember the Truth I know that I am both good enough and cared-for. As I celebrate the spiritual investment I am currently making I am reminded that there is a difference between reading and being 'read by' a story. After all, storytelling has been used for many years to pass wisdom. How often do we take the time to learn from our own stories?

Blessings, joy and peace my friends!