A most interesting thing happened tonight. After 7 of us were gathered in a room to begin the retreat the facilitator, Dr. James Golden, explained that we would not be proceeding with the retreat. Strangely enough I did not feel alarm or disappointment at this news, but nodded as he explained that normally the retreat format he followed required a minimum of 15 people and that such numbers in his experience empowered the process of consciousness and unfolding.
We did sit around for a couple of hours though. A couple of attendees asked questions. One was about meditation and another about spiritual teachers (James Golden has studied with some very well-known and notable teachers). As I consider what he shared I have no doubts as to his depth and perspective as a metaphysician, and I celebrate him showing up with integrity and authenticity to know what felt right and what did not.
As I sit back and reflect upon this I am drawn to the idea that life is a teacher and that I do not need a special weekend with a special teacher to go on retreat. Even if I break events down I can see clearly that arrangements have been made for my daughter until Sunday and that my wife has her weekend booked with Fringe plays. It occurs to me that this weekend is obviously a gift for me to go on my own little retreat. And so I shall know the Flow as I go, and allow the Divine to guide me in working with my Sacred Self.
I celebrate this realization. One of the things that James shared was that in his mind that a 'spiritual teacher' ran the risk of being a trap. It is a fine line to live the role of 'teacher' whilst managing the egoic mind wanting to advance its agenda, and muddying the waters of who the teacher actually is. And in turn, for the student it is also a fine line to live the role of 'student' whilst managing the egoic mind wanting to abdicate responsibility to someone wiser than they, as if the answers would come from someone who is 'closer to God' (as if such a thing is actually true). After all, ego notwithstanding are not all teachers and gurus ultimately sourced the same, just inhabiting a different body?
It is no coincidence that over the past few months I have been thinking about the idea of whether a teacher might enter into my life. I even wondered at the timing of such reflection and the arrival of Dr. James Golden's retreat. It cannot be a coincidence that the very same person should speak about the 'trap-potential' of a teacher also cancelled the retreat. And as I journal this experience I am clear that life is a teacher, and that I can enter into retreat at any time. All I need is to choose the state of mind to do so.
Know the Flow as you go, my friends. Even when the most unexpected events transpire.
Friday, August 13, 2010
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Very interesting experience Carmien, I guess the lesson is to be aware that the unexpected is always as much an option as the expected. What was in the subconsciousness of the group that manifested this result?
ReplyDeleteIt would be interesting to know what each person ended up doing instead of the retreat and how that affected their life?
Well for me, I am continuing my retreat. I am grateful for the learning and the inspiration to realize that I can go on retreat at any time, for any reason; it really is a state of mind. Such a learning is a powerful opportunity.
ReplyDeleteAnd so speaking for myself, your question about why this manifested, the answer is actually astoundingly clear. I also took the opportunity to email James and thank him. Here is an excerpt from the email I shared with him:
"I felt inspired to share this message and the blog entry with you. Sometimes hearing feedback that living by our integrity is right, even when it might feel a little uncomfortable, can be a onederful reminder of the Divine expressing through every event."
Yes, totally!
ReplyDeleteHave a wonderful "personal" retreat buddy.