Yes, as of 6pm tonight I will be re-treating myself for a weekend. I get to spend three days with Dr. James Golden at the Centre for Spiritual Living in Edmonton.
The past couple of weeks have been interesting from an emotional point of view. It would seem that in order to prepare to treat myself in retreat that stuff under the surface is now making it way outward. Only yesterday I was speaking with my wife, describing the emotional struggle I have been facing over the past couple of days. She pointed out that the timing was interesting; that I should be feeling turmoil around my current business efforts was likely a part of preparing for the retreat.
My wife often has great wisdom to share. I am certain that in that moment something was unlocked. And a little later that day I was reminded of the idea that it is embracing the mystery of life that makes for the most profound of journies. I might not know the how of but that's actually alright. If anything it is knowing that the Divine is in all things that counts.
And so as I go through this preparation I am inspired with a realization that two central ideas have surfaced for me:
- It is time to revisit my personal vision for my professional life
- I am ready to release the emotional reactions that have been hindering me for so many years
Interestingly, yesterday was a very intense day for me emotionally. It was as if the result from my Practitioner exam was a sign saying that I am moving toward Ministry while the emotional rollercoaster ride of my business consulting, along with a series of contradictory experiences, was saying the self-image around myself as a consultant was being shattered.
Each day I venture further into being a Practitioner is another day I am reminded that ultimately my desire to serve and support the transformation of consciousness is the greatest calling of all. Yet I am finding myself in this no-mans-land of not being a Minister or in full time ministry and the need to continue in my role as a business consultant. However, even the journalling (sharing of this with you in this blog) is surfacing the realization that this is exactly as it should be. How things will unfold is a mystery. I can content myself with the knowledge that I have stated the intent to live life in service as a Practitioner. The Universe is conspiring to support me in this and the only thing that can get in the way is my forgetting this.
The wonderful bonus of all this - if any questions about what we want to work on during the retreat are asked I will have an idea or two.
Friday, August 13, 2010
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When you told me you were unable to make Meditation last night I thought also it was the retreat you had begun. I know from my own past, often signing up for such things the event start to show it self in my live days and weeks before the event. So, great shifts are in progress for you. YAHHH!!!
ReplyDeleteI officially have my own working car; part of life is on the mend and working well.